field sobriety

tonight i admire the reflection of my bone structure as i close the kitchen window on the cold. my glass is one quarter full of warm spicy wine; the pink matches my cheeks and makes my eyes glow.

there is a feeling in the air here i can't name. i'm strangely fine with everything in my head, though i should not be.

in the car, on the drive home, i clenched my fists until my wrists ached and shouted "god dammit, no," at the stereo. again and again. it's dangerous to love anything so much, even only a song.

tired, delighted, disappointed - the drive was too long and too short. the true story of this past week. i let myself get distracted, my careful life got disrupted and now i will pay for it in working hours and fractions of gpa.

perhaps i'll look up my guitar tomorrow and see about making amends. i have a few things to say, and a few things to do.

i'm old enough to understand, but young enough to still believe.

it's not the sturdiest precipice.

lucky i've learned to walk on tiptoe to stretch my legs out and make my jeans fit. i'll toe this line as carefully as any other, and find success that stems from a slow cigarette on a steamy august afternoon. i made my decision and i possess the integrity to stay with it.

if you hold out your arms, you can find balance.